the light is different, like through a fine layer of wire mesh, my focus is soft and long distance. I am slow, heavy lidded, my tongue is thick and rests weighed down on the bottom of my mouth, when i have to speak i hear it from a great distance words somehow from me but not. i feel outside of myself like those near death stories that you hear, floating above surrounded by light. But then i feel inside myself deep down, way beneath the external sensations, too far to register, too far to care that the sun feels nice on my face. Its what i always thought herion would feel like minus the nausea and itching. Like sleeping, like dying, like asphyxiation.