if i was god

i would ban public squelchy kissing
i wouldnt let cats out
i wouldnt have a beard
i would walk around town with a pointy stick and poke people
i would definately be a little offended by the daggyness of people who believed in me, the fact that they advertise for me on the back of toilet walls and offer salvation with a free biscuit at the uni cafe
i would instigate some sort of dress code into christianity
obviously i would be an interventionist god unless the god that made me god made me the kind of god that couldnt intervene
it goes without saying that i would reinvent Australia, USA, UK, Indonesia, many parts of Europe Asia Africa Sth America leaving iceland alone because they are all a bit cute.
My reinvention may include the abolition of any sort of representation for anyone with any beliefs other than my own. no power for people named george, john, tony, guy sebastian, michael jackson madonna walt disney or rupert murdoch or any of the wiggles.
i might like to get rid of the flu, period pain, any kind of terminal illness that doesnt make you feel fucking fantastic before you die and all suffering for everyone in a developing nation, developed nations can suffer for a bit.
and i might like to say everyone gets to have great happy joyful love at least once every year.
or i might actually say sod you all im going to hang out on mars
cause im god and i can